Recruitment
Div 1 Skill, 6v6
Turbo
Posted: | Last Online:
Well university is ending. I guess I have to be a adult now. But fuck that I can play video games again.
No longer will I be bound to the Chinese bakery web cafe.
Pretty new at this game. Some say I'm the new kid on the block.
Probably better than that ondkaja guy.
User Profile | SteamID: U:1:13432028
Team History
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content rss
– THE RETURN –
What do you mean “probably”?
turbo pls
Where’s the Div1 at Turbo? Not worried you lost your aim are you? =D
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=uB1D9wWxd2w
https://www.dropbox.com/s/2mx1w2qnitbjnlj/Truth%20of%20turbo.png
https://dl.dropboxusercontent.com/u/14444750/turbomonkeyconfession.jpg
https://dl.dropboxusercontent.com/u/14444750/temble.png
https://dl.dropboxusercontent.com/u/14444750/turbos%20girlfriend.png
https://dl.dropboxusercontent.com/u/14444750/turbo%20and%20his%20true%20thoughts3.jpg
https://dl.dropboxusercontent.com/u/14444750/turbo%20and%20his%20true%20thoughts2.jpg
“Harry! Open up I need to use the toilet!” Audrey pounded on the bathroom door where her flatmate and lifelong friend Harry Styles was taking a shower. Having been best friends since they were about six, when Harry made the decision to move out, Audrey was the natural mum-approved choice for a flatmate. They had been living together for over two years now, and had seen every side of each other.
“Erm…Don’t come in, Darling. I—er I left the shower curtain open.” Harry’s voice came from behind the door.
“If you get the floor wet again, I’m going to kill you!” Audrey replied. “But seriously, I need to whizz.”
“Can you wait until I’m out of the shower?! Please?”
“I’ve seen you naked before, Har; just—I’m coming in, alright?” She fiddled the lock until it clicked and the door swung open.
“AUD!” Harry screamed as Audrey came sprinting into the bathroom. The shower curtain was open, and Harry was indeed naked, but he was not alone in the shower. To call her a girl would not be accurate; this woman was at least in her late twenties or early thirties. Harry yanked the curtain closed in a huff.
Audrey repressed the urge to laugh; she mumbled an apology and did her business as intended. She finished, washed her hands, and left the bathroom. An hour later when Harry came into her room, she burst out laughing.
“Wot?!” Harry demanded.
“No, no, I get it. Every guy’s got at least one older woman fantasy, but that was just too priceless.” Audrey rolled over on her bed, still laughing.
“Shut up! I don’t make fun of the guys you bring home!” Harry whined, smacking her with a pillow.
“That’s because the guys I bring home aren’t twice my age.” She got to the other side of the bed and armed herself the other pillow before Harry could smack her with it.
“Actually, she found me quite mature for my age.”
Audrey laughed again. “She obviously didn’t spend enough time with you; we both know that’s not a lie.”
“Okay can we stop talking about my sex life for now?” Harry begged. “Let’s go out and do something!”
“Alright, we can go out for a bit, grab some food, go get pissed and then I’ll let you hold my hair while I vomit.”
*Later that night*
“You know, when you said I would be holding your hair back while you vomit, I didn’t think you were serious.”
Audrey retched, releasing more of her stomach contents into the toilet. “But here we are, and you’re holding my hair back. You’re a good friend, Harry.”
“I’m the best friend ever, Aud; don’t ever forget that.”
“You really are Harry, I love you.” She hurled one last time, “Okay I think I’m done now.”
“I’ll go make you some tea.”
“Ginger?” she asked.
“With honey, just like you like it,” Harry patted her head and exited.
Audrey got up and brushed her teeth. She looked at herself in the mirror her makeup was smeared down her face and her hair was sticking out in every direction. Not that it had ever mattered with Harry, but still she suddenly felt the desire to make herself more presentable; she bushed her hair back into a messy bun and swiped makeup remover around her eyes. As she was scrubbing her face clean, Harry came back into the bathroom.
“Your tea is almost ready,” he said staring at her through the mirror, “and I uh—brought you your pyjamas.”
Audrey examined the camisole and shorts he had set down on the counter. “Drunk sick chic.” She teased, “But comfortable, you know me well.”
“I’ve had twelve years of experience.” He replied simply.
“Fair enough.” Audrey pulled off the lacey purple top she had been wearing to go out and replaced it with the camisole.
Harry’s eyes widened at the sight of Audrey’s temporarily bared breasts. They had seen each other naked before, but for the first time the sight of her caused his pulse to quicken. He breathed a tiny sigh of relief as she tugged the camisole down over her body.
“I’ll uh-I’ll go fix your tea then.”Harry left the bathroom and walked back to the kitchen. He took the cozy off the tea kettle and poured out two mugs. He added a couple spoonfuls of honey to each mug and stirred trying to keep his mind as far from Audrey’s breasts as possible; it wasn’t working out too well.
“You’re an angel, Harry.” The sound of Audrey’s voice at Harry’s shoulder made him jump. Audrey giggled and rubbed Harry’s shoulders.
“You better believe it.” He replied, handing her a mug of tea.
Audrey took the mug in both hands and padded into the living room. Setting the tea down on the coffee table, she curled herself up on the sofa and turned on the telly. “Ooh!” she exclaimed, “Rocket Power is on! Harry, let’s watch it!”
“But we’ve seen this episode a million times.” Harry complained.
“Oi! I’m convalescing here, we’ll watch what I want and you will enjoy it!” Audrey commanded. “Now get over here!”
There was no point in trying to protest with her, so he gave in and curled up behind her on the sofa. Every now and then one of them would sit up to take a sip of tea, and then they would lie back down. After awhile Harry took the hair elastic out of Audrey’s hair and ran his fingers through it, something he had taken up doing on nights like these when Audrey was sick or tired or *gulp* that time of the month. He found that stroking her hair like this helped calm her fall asleep or calm her down when she was angry. With every pass of his hand he would catch a whiff of her shampoo: apples, with a hint of daffodil, it smelled fresh and clean without being too sweet.
Audrey snuggled in closer to Harry, the warmth of his body better than the coziest blanket. The feeling of his hand running through her hair was soothing and she could feel her eyelids getting heavy. Not quite ready to fall asleep she sat up, gulped down the last few dregs of her tea, and playfully beaned Harry with a throw pillow.
“So, was the old lady any good? You never said.”
Harry groaned, “We’re not talking about this, Aud.”
“Oh come on, Benjamin!” Audrey urged, “Spill: how was Mrs. Robinson? Does experience really come with age?”
“We’re not talking about this!” Harry repeated with more force. “My personal business is none of yours.”
“See, that right there is how I know it wasn’t any good. If it was good, you’d be telling me every detail until I begged you to stop. But you’re being defensive, which can only mean that it was terrible.” Audrey gasped, “Did you have to fake it?”
“Aud,” Harry warned.
“Were you worried she was going to break a hip? Did you have an allergic reaction to her denture cream?”
“Audrey,”
“At least you don’t have to worry about getting her pregnant, with her having gone through the change and all. Did that make it any different? Oh god, she must be as wide a launch pad down there. That’s revolting.”
“AUDREY! I don’t want to talk about it!” Harry growled.
“So did she spank you, tell you that you’re a naughty little boy?” Audrey teased, “Did she want you to call her mummy?”
“Maybe she did! Wot of it?!” Harry screamed.
“I knew it! I knew this was one massive ‘Who’s your Mummy’ thing! God, that is sick!” Audrey passed a hand over her face. “I mean the ‘Older Woman’ fantasy is typical for guys our age, but she should be ashamed! She really was old enough to be your mum!”
“So what?! I’m over the age of consent! It’s not that big of a deal!” Harry’s face was getting red. He clenched down hard on his teeth.
“No? What if she had kids, eh? What if they were our age?!” Audrey had tossed all teasing aside and become quite cross at Harry. She generally had no problem with the girls he brought home, but something about this woman had gotten under her skin and stuck there.
“I don’t know what you mean,” Harry replied evasively.
“Oh really, Oedipus? Well, let me put it in a scenario you can understand. What if it was your mum who was sexing up younger boys? Boys that are our age, would you want a stepdad who was your age?” she stared at Harry intently until he was forced to look away.
“No,” he said to the floor. “I guess not.”
“Okay then.” Audrey sighed and slumped back into the corner of the sofa. “How did we get to the fighting?”
“You were being a twit.” Harry replied with a small smile.
“You love me anyway.”
“You know I wouldn’t put up with you if I didn’t.”
“Besides,” Audrey continued, “If you kicked me out, who would you get that would tolerate your periodical need to walk around in the nude, and awkward bathroom habits?”
“It’s true,” Harry agreed. “We’re a perfect match. Nobody else could handle us.”
Audrey smiled and playfully punched his shoulder.
“Oh, that’s how it’s going to be, is it?” Harry asked, rising to his feet. In reply, Audrey punched him again this time just below his navel.
“Oh you’re asking for it now, Aud.” With one arm, Harry scooped Audrey up off the sofa and onto the floor. Pinning her arms with one hand he straddled her body and placed cherry drops along her collarbone with the other hand.
Audrey squirmed and struggled under Harry’s weight, trying to escape any more cherry drops before she started bruising.
“Say uncle,” Harry commanded.
“That another one of your twisted fantasies?” Audrey asked, still teasing. It was a bold move, but it distracted Harry enough that he moved the hand that was pinning her arms down so she could reach up and roll them over.
Harry cried out in protest as Audrey pinned him down. “I surrender!” He yelled.
“I haven’t even done anything yet, you wimp.” Audrey grinned down at her best friend. It was the split second Harry needed to grab Audrey’s arms and the elbows and knock her down on top of him. They lay there for a moment laughing and hugging until as quick as a blink one pair of lips brushed against the other’s. Neither was sure who initiated the first kiss but as they lay on the floor staring at each other in shock, the more it seemed as natural as breathing air. Nobody knew Audrey better than Harry did, and nobody was attuned with Harry like Audrey was.
“We’d be amazing,” Audrey thought out loud. She stared into those green-grey eyes she knew so well and felt something spreading through her body like wildfire. Her entire body sparked with electricity.
For what felt like the first time in his life, Harry could not form a response. Here he was, lying on the floor with his best mate, who happened to be drop dead gorgeous on top of him; her breasts pressed firmly against his chest and the graceful curve of her arse resting at the waistband of his sweats, causing his nether regions to twitch in anticipation. In all the years since he had hit puberty, all the times he had seen Audrey partially or completely naked, all the times they had fallen asleep cuddled on the couch with her body so close to his, never before had he felt this hot for her. It was like something in his brain was screaming “Why the fuck not?” and he honestly couldn’t think of a reason. Placing one hand on her neck, he pulled her down and crushed her lips to his.
Audrey marveled in the feel of Harry’s lips. They were softer than she imagined, full, pink, and perfect. And just the right amount of moisture. In fact…
“Have you been using my lip balm?” she asked, breaking the kiss just long enough to get the question out.
“It makes me irresistible, Aud,” Harry replied into her lips. “and it feels great on.”
Audrey broke the kiss a second time. She looked down at Harry with an expression that was both amused and slightly annoyed. “Come on Har, that stuff’s expensive!”
“I’ll buy you another tube,” Harry assured her, “now shut up and kiss me you muppet.”
Audrey chuckled and placed her hands on either side of Harry’s face. She nipped and sucked on his lower lip, feeling a smile creep to the corners of his mouth. Harry replaced his hand on the back of Audrey’s neck and pulled her even closer. He ran his tongue along the seam of her lips, begging for entrance. She obliged and soon their tongues were dancing along each other, exploring the unchartered territory of the other’s mouth.
With his free hand, Harry inched the fabric of Audrey’s camisole up her to just below her breasts. His long fingers roamed the skin of her back and abdomen, tracing the five point star on her right hip, which she had gotten to match the one on his bicep. It was their mark on each other, an unspoken symbol of the friendship they had shared for so long. He trailed up from her hips and snaked his fingers under the elastic of her camisole, the rough pads of his fingertips teasing the sensitive flesh on the underside of her breasts.
At the touch of Harry’s fingers, a long sigh escaped from Audrey’s lips. Reciprocating his ministrations, she pushed his shirt up to his armpits, raking her nails down the flat planes of his abs. She teased the sensitive area along the waistband of his jeans, causing Harry to groan in pleasure. Harry placed his hands over Audrey’s and guided them to his belt, the bulge in his pants growing to the point where it was almost painful.
“Are we going to do this, darling?” he rasped. Please he thought to himself please say we’re going to do this.
Audrey smiled and hooked her fingers through Harry’s belt loops, tugging softly. Harry whined at the contact so close to his fly.
“Not here.” She replied softly. “My bed.” She stood up and walked to her bedroom, stripping off her camisole as she went.
Harry bounded up and followed Audrey’s retreating back into her bedroom. Ripping his shirt over his head, he grabbed Audrey around the waist and tossed her on the bed. He kissed down from her lips to her neck, collarbone, and then to her breasts. Audrey moaned as Harry’s hot tongue made its way down her abdomen—dipping into her navel—and trailing down to the waistband of her shorts, nipped at the skin along her hip bones, leaving matching love bites on either side.
“Enough with the foreplay—foreplay,” Audrey whined. She took Harry’s hands and placed them on her hips, wrapping his fingers around the elastic of her shorts.
Harry cocked a mischievous eyebrow at Audrey’s impatience. He placed a kiss just above her waistline, grabbing the elastic between his teeth. He dragged her shorts down as slow as humanly possible.
“Oh get on with it for fuck’s sake!”Audrey cried. She pushed at Harry’s hands to pull her shorts down faster, “I’m serious, I’ll start without you.”
“Oh really?” Harry laughed, “I think I’d like to see that.” He paused, long enough to gage Audrey’s reaction, and then pushed her shorts down to her ankles. He spread her legs and kissed up each thigh before running his tongue across her opening. He licked and sucked on her center like a ripe mango while his long fingers worked on her opening, stretching her to fit his size.
Audrey moaned and arched her back at the touch of Harry’s mouth and fingers. She twined her fingers into his hair and guided his mouth to where she wanted him. “Oh God.” She gasped with another flick of Harry’s tongue. She could feel the warmth spreading from the roots of her hair to the tips of her toes, sending tremors through her limbs.
Harry looked up to see Audrey’s face and body flushed a deep red; with one final lick, he left from between her legs and worked his way back up to her lips. He peppered her face with kisses while his hands fumbled to free himself from the confines of his trousers and pants.
“Hey” Audrey complained into Harry’s lips, “You’re taking all of my fun.” She took a hold of Harry’s belt, “Lemme do that.” She sat up and shimmied Harry’s trousers and pants down to the floor where he promptly kicked them off. No matter how many times she had seen him walk naked around their flat or strip down while she was in the bathroom, she had never taken the time to stop and admire the sheer sight of his naked body. He really was a marvel: the flat planes of his abs, the perfect v where his hips met his legs, and there was no point in discounting the size of his penis, which was now curled up against his stomach. “Nice,” she said simply.
Harry replied with a subtle raise of his eyebrows. Audrey smirked and ran her nails down Harry’s chest, leaving red welts, and then wrapped her hand around his shaft. She worked the length while placing chaste kisses on his chest and stomach. Harry dipped his head down to capture Audrey’s lips.
“Are you ready, Love?” he asked, running the pad of his thumb across her cheek.
Audrey looked up at the boy and smiled. “Let’s do it then.”
Harry grinned and tossed Audrey back against the pillows. He climbed onto the bed and worked his way up to the headboard until he was hovering over her. He placed his hands on either side of her shoulders, supporting his weight above her. “You’re lovely,” he whispered running his length along her outer lips.
“And you’re stalling.” Audrey shot back.
Harry chuckled and kissed her mouth using that moment to push inside her just a little. Audrey let out a sound between a moan and a cry into Harry’s mouth. Harry broke the kiss and examined her face.
“Did I hurt you?” he asked nervously.
“I’m fine,” Audrey breathed. “Just keep going, slowly.”
“Oh now you want me to go slow.” Harry teased
“Shut up and fuck me already.”
Harry rebalanced himself above Audrey and eased himself in as slowly as his self control would allow. Once he was in all the way he paused so Audrey could adjust to having all of him inside of her. Within a few minutes Audrey was swiveling her hips, urging Harry to move. He pulled out halfway and thrust back in, finding a rhythm that suited them both. Every rock of Harry’s hips incited a mixture of moans and profanities from Audrey’s lips. She buried her face in his neck, nipping and sucking on the sensitive skin there, intent on marking him. The feel of Audrey’s hot breath fanning out against his neck caused Harry to growl low in his throat; he could feel that familiar pull starting behind his navel, his hair plastering to his forehead and neck. He increased the tempo of his thrusts and used his thumb to massage her cleft, determined to get Audrey to finish first.
Audrey yelped and threw her head back against the pillow, her fingers clawing at the sheets. “Holy-shit-Har,” she moaned between thrusts, “oh God—fan-tas-tic!”
Harry smiled and kissed her forehead, increasing his ministrations on her center. He was so close, if he could just get her there first.
Audrey felt those all too familiar tremors running through her body again, sweat pooled between her breasts and at the hollow of her throat; her vision blurred, she wrapped her legs around Harry’s waist to pull him in as far as he could go. She lifted herself up off the bed and sunk her teeth into his shoulder. She screamed into his skin as she exploded in waves of pleasure, every inch of her body tingling.
Harry’s thrusts were becoming more sporadic, his breathing uneven and shallow. Audrey screams were just enough to send him over the edge. His eyes fluttered closed and a smile played at the corners of his mouth. He lifted her face to his and captured her lips.
“I love you, Audrey,” he said, and with one final push, Harry spilled himself inside of her.
They lay in the bed for a few moments as their bodies calmed down. Audrey curled herself into Harry’s chest, not worried about being sweaty or how she was going to need to wash her sheets in the morning. Things had never made more sense than they did at that moment.
“So,” she asked once she had regained her breath, “was I better than the old lady?”
Harry stared at her incredulously. Audrey fit with him like an extension of his body, and now having experienced her body in full, there really was nobody like hers. It may have been the heat of the moment that had caused him to utter the words, but thinking back on it, he did love her. And realizing it just made his answer all the more accurate.
“Better than the old lady, Darling.” He said running a hand through her hair, “Better than ever.”
#Unban Pennyfarming
#Unban Turbomonkey
#Unban Fun
chinese bakeries are the fucking best
http://visualrecipes.com/images/uploads/recipe_images/264_image1.jpg
Best medic in d3
funny guy
https://scontent-b-cdg.xx.fbcdn.net/hphotos-frc3/t1/375090_10152884646060287_484476901_n.jpg
Good guy, great buddy, 10/10 would bang again.
Can ez handle top d4/low d3.
gl