Animal Mother

I will be the best tf2 player
I will always carry my team every game
No spy will ever backstab me
I will win every battle against the enemy team and survive
Me and our engis will always protect the intel and enemy cant get it
In trades I will always get lucky and get good profit
Only good items will be in my backpack
All the medics will respect and heal me
No players will be able to dominate me
I will get the best things on roll the dice
Friendlies will not get in my way
My skill will not be rivaled by any other players
No spy will be able to destroy my sentry nest
All the medics will always uber me
My reflexes and shots will be out of this world
B4nny and more players will respect and wanna play with me
I will be the deadliest player on team
I will get a 30 killstreak every day
I can win every 1 versus 1 fight every time
Even pyro w+m1 will die to me
I will get all achievements
I am always on the top of the scoreboard
I am a pro team fortress 2 player