Recruitment

  Div 3 Skill, 6v6

swimp

Posted by Colt.: 13 years ago | Last Online: 13 years ago

I am an international man of mystery and I have a large array of trenchcoats. My trenchcoats are as colourful as they are voluminous. The pockets are handy for long road trips because they can store a great number of Snickers bars. I have an abstract hatred of all things human and if you are to join this team you must own a fur suit.

If the above paragraph makes no sense to you then you have passed the first test. If you can put up with people from Yorkshire then you have passed the second test (a love of all things corn- and farming-related is an added bonus). If you have passed these two tests and are A NICE PERSON capable of appreciating English humour, then you sir/madam are eligible to contact Colt. or BoneS! on Steam for further information.

Addendum:
Here at swimp we are an equal opportunity employer and occasionally we even grant women the right to speek freely and other such cultural revelations. However the time has come to announce that the player we are looking for needs to come from a specific market; namely we are searching for someone who is English or as close to English as possible. Take Mortal for example, we allow him into the team because we aren't convinced he's Danish and because he taught weasel how to say cream in his native language. Here at swimp we think that type of stuff is adorable so please don't hesitate to contact us if you are more adorable than Mort in any way. Remember: swimp is a family organisation. swimp cares. swimp is forever.

DISCLAIMER: Justin Beiber haircuts not wanted because the mumble has three of those already and one of those is Norweigian and frankly I cannot begin to describe just how wrong that truly is.

Addendum #2:
Should you happen to be a stoop-down man, we would be very interested to hear from you and negotiate a purchase of a constant supply of your Hot Nuts. Straw hat and cane optional.

Addendum #3:
Because we here at swimp are all about the equal opportunities, we are changing our search to one for a person capable of playing soldier to a div 3 level or above.

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