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THE unofficial ETF2L PREMIERSHIT HIGHLANDER Post-season Post
Created 31st January 2016 @ 10:29
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First of all I would like to thank teams Chessclub, Strong Opinions and the wonderful ETF2L Admin Team (?) for great scheduling of the playoffs on each of their parts.
As a reminder for people new to this, my posts are always 100% serious to avoid confusion. I also represent the official stance of Highpander e-sports.
Once again we have had an extremely interesting season of “Premiership highlander”, where we can objectively divide the teams into two tiers: “Top Prem” and “Bottom Prem”, consisting of the Top 3 and Bottom 5 respectively. I will now proceed to provide you all with an expert analysis of each group of teams and their future in Professional E-Sports.
Let us start with the Top 3! a.k.a. the
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| “lmfao who even cares” division |
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Once again for the dear lord who knows how many seasons in a row we have the same situation as with most seasons past. After winning the premiership division once or twice, teams go to a 6-year break in between seasons because “muh overlap” and “muh i dont want to play highlander outside of seasons but i want seasons so i can play this gamemode i dont want to play otherwise” (seriously, I don’t understand this. If you want to play more highlander, maybe you should just play it inbetween seasons since you probably dont have a life anyway)
During this extended period of time of having a championship under your belt, not having the prizes handed out to you and not playing this gamemode, you FINALLY realize something about this gamemode: It blows! It’s slow, there are snipers and spies, stickies suck, there are 3 classes only challenged people enjoy playing, the map pool is stale and everyone who plays it seems to be at the mental age of 10 years old. After that you still put up a team for the next season (with half of the players you had previously) and lose motivation halfway through the season, making for an extremely interesting playoff phase.
Let’s use this time to look at some examples of great teams who outclassed their competition for a season or two and then proceeded to move into a slump!
http://etf2l.org/teams/8855/ SNSD
http://etf2l.org/teams/14729/ Kill Switch
http://etf2l.org/teams/18884/ Highpander
http://etf2l.org/teams/17127/ Tourettes Chessclub
Props to chessclub for lasting for twice the amount of seasons compared to killswitch and highpander but after watching the finals (i didnt watch it), the same thing seems to repeat.
Congratulations to Strong Opinions for winning the season though… only time will tell what will happen to these valuable players in the future!
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| STACKED IS BACK ||| TO THE HIGH TIER |
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As for the bottom 5, this is the place where people try and fail miserably
something about russians folding, experiment folding, harshfarts not able to carry clork and last but definitely not least
http://puu.sh/mQmuR/7e76f604bf.png
This is the only thing people care about (using myself as the sample size conducted for this survey)
congrats to whoever got into prem blah blah time to move on to
Last edited by Muuki,
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|OFFICIAL BEST PLAYERS BY CLASS|
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seeing as i’m too lazy to decorate, i’ll be using screenshots to convey my point, teehee :p
i rEALLY wish i didnt accidentally manage to go full retard and lose all that i had written
SCOUT – http://puu.sh/mQmGL/597d4be86b.png
Finnish, Biggest fragger, Cutest voice, Unlock user, what more could you ask for? The competition for this class was extremely tight in my mind, barring one latvian individual and one administrative individual (my internet browser does not recognize latvia as a word btw)
SOLDIER – http://puu.sh/mQmLP/e74c02102e.png
Let’s be real for a moment: If you’re in the award poll, it’s only natural to vote for yourself unless you are insecure about your own capabilities. Thankfully, I don’t have that problem
I’m the best regardless
PYRO – http://puu.sh/mQmNU/765a428937.png
Steve-=()=- Is quite a talented pyro. However good he may be though, the impact that a pyro can have on the game is quite limited (to say the least(yet some people still fail to play it))
My browser doesn’t recognize pyro as a word either.
DEMOMAN – http://puu.sh/mQmQK/d4a9772b56.png
Managing to carry bunch’a’dribblers (this was recognized) and being my former teammate (?) earned an easy victory for Joe N U F C in this category. Other demomen (barring Henry Harris Hilton Hilder Hildreth Hitler Harrison Hildoge) do the same things as he does with less visible impact, probably because they had actual teammates backing them up.
please save me from playing with hildreth or teach him how to shoot pipes once in a lifetime.
HEAVY – http://puu.sh/mQmWn/461d8a1364.png
This choice was influenced by the chance to finally get noticed by an irl grill.
kkaltuu is still the statistically proven best heavy so i would advise you all to step your game up
ENGINEER – http://puu.sh/mQmYy/5dc2df0296.png
He hits shotgun shots, so he is automatically better than 99.9% of his class playerbase. Nevertheless I quite don’t understand the concept of this class: Why would you play a shooter game as a class that’s designed not to shoot? And why would you play this class if you can actually shoot?
Basically a worse version of Lenny, but that’s understandable since Lenny is the best. A lot better than bubblebobbler though, who is in my eyes the 3rd best engineer player in europe.
MEDIC – http://puu.sh/mQn4h/91d82da5d0.png
For some unknown reason I couldn’t find my name among the candidates for this highly mechanically and mentally demanding class, so I had to choose the second best option
oh no what i did
SNIPER – http://puu.sh/mQn6u/3245b702da.png
The best at concealing his hacks. Spectating him looks like watching someone on 5 different substances. Speaking of spectating, have I ever complained about the demo submitting system where you can toggle your hacks on for that one moment in the season and then just say “lol i forgot to record teehee xd” and you get punished by a -minor warning- and a -month long ban if you fail 938549032 times-. Please consider at least applying a Major Warning or something along those lines for failed submitting of demos.
And in general, if you are a cheater and are reading this, please re-evaluate your life choices of cheating in a children’s game for children.
That’s all for this time folks; Hopefully I have quit the game by the time the next season rolls around so I don’t have to write autistic paragraphs and 100 word essays due tomorrow anymore. Also please give me my money sonnyblack
Last edited by Muuki,
WHERE’S SPY REVIEW?
http://i.imgur.com/J23B1I2.jpg
also spy confirmed worst class in the game
also candle > steve
Last edited by olBaa,
wtf is highlander
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