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During the Summer, we regularly asked users to contribute poems when making a silly request for an Admin from #etf2l. There were some very creative submissions and equally some rather bizarre and disturbing poems.

It became a bit of a game to see who could get the funniest poem from an ETF2L user, so I thought I might share a few of the highlights with you in this thread:

boomeh:
(boomeh) sorry I’m not perfect
(boomeh) sorry for liking tf2
(boomeh) sorry for cheating
(boomeh) sorry I was untrue
(boomeh) sorry I hurt you
(boomeh) I didn’t mean to
(boomeh) I’m sorry I hurt you
(boomeh) I regret it, I do
(boomeh) What I did, I regret
(boomeh) So let’s make up and forget

boomeh (again)

(boomeh) There once was an ugly soldier
(boomeh) With a hoodie all stubby and brown
(boomeh) And the tf2 community said many words
(boomeh) Get out of town
(boomeh) Get out, get out, get out of town
(boomeh) And he went with a sob and a cry and a waddle
(boomeh) But now he is back
(boomeh) from outer space
(boomeh) with a brand sound
(boomeh) and an apologetic look upon his face
(boomeh) my name is boomeh
(boomeh) and I am r8 sorreh

spence
M y one and only, the one who brings light into my live,
A person who i know i can always rely on,
T he man who understands me,
T he man who i treasure,

D 2M is his name,
A scout is what he does best, along with being a
V ery very good admin, with organisation skills second to none,
I know he will understand that people sometimes go wrong.
E very breath you take, fills me with emotion,
S adness fills me everytime i see you leave

A poem for Matt Davies

By Matthew Spence

turbomonkey
Teardrops fell from my eyes as i gase at the computer screen . My hast to make a team blinded my common sense forcing my fingers to type information into the gaping void of the interent . The deed is done . The account set in stone . My fate up to you admin .

Smofo
Racio Racio the admin of my heart,
if he never wouldve answered my question my heart would’ve fell apart,
I love his style of doing his job, he’s not as bad as that d2m the slob!
so I value him high in his opinons and lust for answering my boring question,
I think we would have a place on the forum a WE LOVE RACIO section.

Lamentov
Lermontov’s poem
Íî÷åâàëà òó÷êà çîëîòàÿ
Íà ãðóäè óòåñà-âåëèêàíà;
Óòðîì â ïóòü îíà óì÷àëàñü ðàíî,
Ïî ëàçóðè âåñåëî èãðàÿ;
Íî îñòàëñÿ âëàæíûé ñëåä â ìîðùèíå
Ñòàðîãî óòåñà. Îäèíîêî
Îí ñòîèò, çàäóìàëñÿ ãëóáîêî,
È òèõîíüêî ïëà÷åò îí â ïóñòûíå.
err yeah…

Zurike
23:15 – Zurike: roses are red
23:15 – Zurike: sea is blue
23:16 – Zurike: if you help us
23:16 – Zurike: i’ll love you

Noe
Noe • Today I saw a butterfly,
Noe • as it floated in the air;
Noe • Its wings were spread in splendor,
Noe • Unaware that I was there.
Noe • It was such a thing of beauty,
Noe • It was a sight to see;
Noe • It was the perfect masterpiece,
Noe • Full of grace and majesty.
Noe • I found myself thinking,
Noe • to what can this compare?
Noe • And then in the end, it came to me
Noe • My latest kill, torn by stickies
Noe • His corpse scattered through the air.
Noe • – the end – I dedicate this poem to D2M, who inspired me to become the new shakespeare

Byte
[18:26] LOL
[18:26] roses are red
[18:26] violets are blue
[18:26] i saw d2m
[18:26] in a bikini line too
[18:26] PWNED
[18:26] epic poem.

lolage
-13:05:05- (lolage) Nuffin nuffin nuffin
-13:05:21- (lolage) Rhymes with muffin
-13:05:25- (lolage) But nuffin nuffin nuffin
-13:05:29- (lolage) Rhymes with ‘orange’
-13:05:35- (lolage) Could it be
-13:05:39- (lolage) That a cup of tea
-13:05:43- (lolage) Is not as good with an orange
-13:05:57- (lolage) As a muffin?

Atty
D2M, D2M, D2M, why did you lock the thread we all love and hate?
We all know you dislike the new freight,
But that doesn’t mean you have to debate.
Think about all of the ETF2L visitors who come and take the bait,
We don’t wanna sit and wait,
For the enemy to dictate.
Noone really wants stalemate,
On a shit map like gravelpate.

There might be one or two I’ve missed out. If you sent us a beautiful poem and you can’t see it featured, please message me on IRC and I’ll add it in :D

More poems from the community are also welcome ;)

Quoted from crzfst

Byte won.

byte won

Quoted from Turbo

Somehow i knew this would come back to haunt me

Next time i hope you think twice young man.

supa dupa

Added Atty’s poem, which was a request to unlock the Chatlogs of Strangeness thread.

Quoted from crzfst

Byte won.

My eyes are filled with tears.