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i40 was pretty beastin and strange at some points so the snuke team and I have decided to create an account of our experiences.

26th Thursday

Lan video 1:

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=nB_0CZbvTbQ

I met up with rej r7an and Sheebay in Glasgow for the bus to London and I downed a bottle of wine and some 18% ale at about 10am. I then paid for this by vomiting 4 times on the megabus while passing out during the intervals.

Lan video 2:

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=m9m47VzI28Q

Apparently I spouted out some rather odd comments about assassination. When we arrived at London we met A.k, probably the slowest and most relaxed person I have ever met. After r7an hugged him we went on the train journey to Newbury in which I left my head hanging out the window. After about 12 hours of being sick and going about on an empty stomach we eventually met the rej group at their tents and then sign in for early arrival service. (rej are fucking awesome people obviously) A low point was when Matt and Thalien thought that I was the pigeon rapist but I corrected them. We then met JG who is also another rather nice chap who was beastin it on turris. Steam would not work and if I remember correctly r7an went and got pissed with rej and I retreated to the hotel with Sheebz and A.k because I felt like passing out. Here are pictures of me pretty much unconscious on the bus and one of A.k and r7an being wierd:

http://img534.imageshack.us/gal.php?g=photo0140u.jpg

27th Friday

Steam didn’t work again so pretty much started off the day by drinking. I can’t actually remember much of what happened that day. We met ilike2spin, our medic who was of course a beastin guy. Had a nice cigar outside with rej r7an, the snukers and rej. R7an was also kind enough to supply people with plenty bottles of buckfast. We then played some drinking games I think. There was also a classy moment when rej r7an shouted to a cleaner lady that Spence wanted her “clunge.” She then gave Spence the evil eye so he shouted back that she wasn’t even fucking hot. Danielsan and Smurfy then turned up quite late after having trouble with his car. Danielsan then RQ because he couldnt connect after 2 hours while Smurfy just joined in with the rest of us and got pissed. I think it was this night that Smurfy beasted and downed about half a pint of whisky mixed with beer. This time rej r7an decided to come back and forced A.k to let r7an sleep in our room. R7an then insisted on shitting all over the walls of our toilet and sleeping with A.k in the same bed. After some more very strange conversations and insults we decided to waterboard r7an and it seems he quite enjoyed it. I think he was just thrilled to have ethnic minorities torturing him.

28th Saturday

Saturday was time for competitive play and we had our serious faces on. Danielsan then came back claiming he had been sick all morning so left i40 and gave us free bananas, celebrations, crisps and fizzy juice. It was a shame to see him go. We got beasted by TCM, although A.k still did a fantastic come of carrying rej r7an. We beat the other 2 teams in our groups easily enough then had to play FB in the knockout stages. We quite amazingly managed to not get completely raped and only lost 4 – 1 on cp_well which we were all chuffed about, perhaps my finest moment at lan:

http://yfrog.com/bh94228848j

We then got pissed some more and retreated to the hotel. We then waterboarded rej r7an a few times as usual and Sheebay was shouting at him for stinking of shit. A.k then claimed that r7an couldn’t smell the difference between shit and febreeze.

Here is the waterboarding video:

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=iuXw95i0yPc

29th Sunday

Started pretty much by drinking again, watching the sick final and cheering for epsilon of course! Was a gg. After that snuke decided to setup the official i40 “snuke waterboarding tournament.” Hezitate was the sponsor and the winner would receive £20. We thought rej r7an may have had an chance since he had been practising the nights before but XO fucking beasted it like an eagle. Sheebay had a great time being the torturer forcing skyride to let him join pixel pickup. Watch the videos below for some fun.

Pre-waterboarding interviews:

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=k4BePF71_xY Seraph
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=l5cx6FrUsrU r7an

Official tournament:

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=VOvyRwT0ffU XO
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=n-8mAqsMp6E rej r7an
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Ll71aEWkVL4 seraph
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=FdJhUCk5lYI Sheebay

Sheebay also got raped by rej r7an on the webcam and a happy seraph and mar spectate:

http://img338.imageshack.us/img338/853/rapek.jpg

That night we saw something quite creepy, some CS players were watching some granny porn in their isle wearing nothing but their boxers and to the right there was a freaky ginger raging at cod 4 (maggles and hez had a great time harassing the hell out of him). There was also a nice group hug involving fisshu, mar, extremer, anderson and myself until extremer decided to accidentally pour most of his pint down anderson’s back. I then closed then night by sharing some cigars with a few lads and by giving the almighty sammage a packet of custard creams. The night didn’t end though when back at the hotel, rej r7an insisting in once again sharing a bed with A.k. Sheebay stole rej r7an’s watch and tried to pawn it off at the rej room then started talking about perfume because he is a homosexual. We only had 3 hours to sleep before we had to wake up so I decided to read the Book of John from the Holy Bible the try and cleanse r7an’s soul. It failed – he raged.

30th Monday

After a short amount of sleep we left for paddington and bade farewell to A.k. Rej r7an needed a shit but didn’t take one for about 12 hours. We stopped at a service station and then saw some ironic starlings and made the final video of lan. We also thought of a torture method where you could secretly inject heroin into someone every night without them knowing then stop after a week or so, then they will be confused and turn cold turkey.

Lan video 3:

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=R37eTdmyqAc

Just realised there is not actually very much about TF2.

I love this “because he is a homosexual”
I prefer to say “because I was drunk”

Also you forgot about that naked guy walking past us with the cigars into the tf2 tent.

Ok apparently my waterboarding technique was slightly wrong, which might explain XO lasting so long by holding his breath. Don’t worry, next lan you’ll all scream by my bottle.

Quoted from the bm man

why would you intentionally be waterboarded? it just seems beyond retarded to me

People were lining up to have a go at getting waterboarded by Sheebay tbh. I was surprised too.

Sheebay tried to sell r7an’s 500 pound watch (apparently) to they_said for half a bottle of morgan’s spiced rum.

Yum I had the rum last night.