European

Skive and the noobs

[6on6]
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We usually play from 20-22cet sunday-thursday, contact Nuze or D! to arrange scrims.

Med: Raziel
Demo: Nuze
Pocket: D!
Roamer: ogaR
Scouts: Ozzi + Skive

Subs: Flopy, Zimmer

Storytime With Raziel
It was a cold day when Melissa woke up from her slumber. He noticed she had left his hand down his own ya-hoo all night and because of the heat it had merged
together with her hand. Melissa attempted to remove her whole hand from her own kitty-kat but alas, his tra-la-la will never see the light of day again. Melissa
was frightened when he realized she had a dance class today. He had to attend otherwise she would never be able to dance alongside Rodriques, the travestite
badger. That boy sure had moves. Melissa always dreamed of being penetrated by Rodriques stinky jalapeño, and often dreamt of him. But she mustn't lose track
of the situation at hand. He had to waddle over to the kitchen to get supplies. All the while she had to make sure her siamese twin parents didn't see her. As she
neared the kitchen door she heard a yell from the basement:

"MELISSA GET ME THE BAT, YOUR FATHER IS TRYING TO GIVE ORAL TO HIMSELF AGAIN"

Melissa was never quite sure how they reproduced in order for her to walk the earth, but she couldn't spend time on such nonsense. Her father often tried to pleasure
himself and it did quite a number on their food supply.

As she arrived in the kitchen, she found the bat but was unable to pick up due to her hand being stuck in her ba-jazzle. If she wanted to function like a normal
siamese-offspring again, she had to free herself of this earthy restriction. As she was looking for the keys to salvation, she was thinking of Rodriques and his gentle
touch. When Rodriques danced the cha-cha, all Melissa could feel was the sweet sensation of urine floating through her body.

"Oh sweet rodriques, I will cleanse my innocence so that one day you can purify me with your whiskers."

Through the sea of thoughts, she found the necessary supplies. A pack of butter and a large knife. She quickly stabbed herself in her ChangChongLang
and stuffed the pack of butter in. She flim-flammed her jim-jam until it was smooth enough for her hand to be released from this dark prison. She gave it a
good pull, a pull she wishes to give Rodriques one day and finally she was free. With haste, she got on her bike, unknowing that blood was still rushing
down from her chubacabra. She got on the saddle and twisted it in there to block the plug.

"I want to be your horse, Rodriques. Ride me like the bulls in Spain."

She thought. Melissa arrived at the dance studio, having only killed 3 people when they spotted her with a saddle up her cooch. She entered the building and saw there
a horror she will never be able to forget:

"Rodriques!? Do you comprehend what is currently going on in the situation that is at stake of all places?"

As she saw Rodriques eating the carcass of Latishá, the sassy skank bitch with the moves like jagger.

"mildred bby i can esplen latish and i are actuasly bro and sistr and i love me some incest negros"
"But I was going to be your first, Rodriques. I masturbated to the thoughts of your teeth ripping through my united-jewels. I was going to be the girl to take
your badger-inity!"
"bby im sory but ur jus fukken ugly woman u aint black u aint street yall women are white i cant fuk no bish dat white woman u think ur ganstr nawh ur a goraffe"

Melissa was fed up. Filled with anger. Sadness. Fear. Fear that the badger she thought she once loved devours other women. Melissa felt like she couldn't
handle living like this. She took out the saddle from her limbo-larry and threw it at Rodriques and Latishá. All the while a fountain of red came spewing
out of her. The carpet, the windows, the building, the continent became red. Melissa was spreading her juices across all the nations, until she felt the
poor souls drown in her blood. All but one.

"Rodriques. I once wanted to dance the sex with you, but you have betrayed me."
"no bby im not gun fuk u ur dumb bith lel"

That's when Melissa grabbed onto her insides, and pulled it. Pulled it like she would pull Rodriques all night. Her inside came out. And as she was laying there
Rodriques came up to her body, floating in a sea of red sticky goo and whispered in her ears:

"lel im ur dad"

THE END

10/10 – IGN

Warnings

  • None

Registered Players

ozzi's avatar
Leader
U:1:83988749
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Awards


Upcoming Fixtures

Date Competition Round Team 1 Team 2
No fixtures for this team.

Results

Date Round Team 1 Team 2 Result
Season 19 Division 3 Playoffs [Archives]
Quarter Final Sirius Echelon Skive and the noobs 6 - 0
Logjam Cup - High Bracket [Archives]
Quarter Final Degenerate eSports Sponsored by Molesto Skive and the noobs 3 - 0
Logjam Cup [Archives]
Tiebreakers Round 2 (High Bracket C) Per aspera ad astra Skive and the noobs 0 - 3
Tiebreakers Round 3 (High Bracket C) LAME powered by LAME Skive and the noobs 3 - 0
Round 3 (High Bracket C) Skive and the noobs Per aspera ad astra 0 - 3
Round 2 (High Bracket C) Skive and the noobs LAME powered by LAME 3 - 0
Round 1 (High Bracket C) Skive and the noobs Def.Win Hunters 3 - 0
Season 19 powered by Tt eSPORTS [Archives]
Week 7 (Division 3C) Skive and the noobs TEZC | 403 edition Default Win
Week 6 (Division 3C) #Passion Skive and the noobs 0 - 6
Week 4 (Division 3C) Skive and the noobs Seagulls 3 - 3
Week 2 (Division 3C) Skive and the noobs unoriginal eSports by TF2Pickup.net 3 - 3
Week 1 (Division 3C) Skive and the noobs stones reborn 6 - 0

Demos

Date DL POV Competition Round Team 1 Team 2
No demos for this team.

Team Name History

Date Old Name New Name
Major League Blazing Skive and the noobs
blazebois #keenmode Major League Blazing
blazebois blazebois #keenmode
IHAVEADMINICANDOWHATEVERIWANTHAHAHHAHAHA blazebois
blazebois IHAVEADMINICANDOWHATEVERIWANTHAHAHHAHAHAHAHAHAHA

Player History

Action Player By Date
Left Zimmer Zimmer
Left FloPy FloPy
Left deca deca
Left marKo marKo
Left Skive Skive
More
Left Raziell Raziell
Left nuze nuze
Joined Zimmer nuze
Joined marKo deca
Left Thaigrr Thaigrr
Joined FloPy nuze
Left Die-no RAWR nuze
Joined Die-no RAWR nuze
Joined Raziell nuze
Joined Thaigrr nuze
Joined Skive nuze
Joined deca nuze
Joined ozzi nuze
Joined nuze nuze